abrade the darkness
polish it with ocean sand
tumbling sea glass

review of the year
more knowledge and some haiku
no love and no job

I am pulled along
in your charisma slipstream
but beware the bees

patterns in the clouds
i see meaning everywhere
augur of madness

the urge to programme
to write some algorithms
create something new

we talk, a chaise longue,
indian blue eyed beauty
reclining in silks

homeless in the snow,
battered women in shelters,
sending Christmas love

Impossible

document your soul
and I will learn it by heart
every word precious

friends, conversation
the mutual nurturing
love ecosystem

between hope and death
the rock face of endurance
I cling to a rope

the cold and the night
the flapping of the main sail
raw - tied to the mast

Siren

suicide calls me
I hear the seductive song
escape and be free

is there right and wrong?
moral relativism
is inadequate
cultural differences
need respect ... but at Carthage


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_Carthage

tears dry on my face
film - how important friends are
my friends make me live

fallen leaves of hope
nutrient husk of beauty
collects for compost

purple alphabet
which evolved to roman runes
recorded in bytes

scale - deep sky objects
the Sculptor Supercluster
quasars, red shifted,
make the Milky Way seem small
my mind a mote, my life brief

playing with circuits
I am trying to work out
how to flash the chip

QUIET mind, drift to sleep,
slide down to chocolate depths
breath - temperate - long

microcontrollers
have arrived for programming
let's not melt these ones

a drink of water
or breeze on a humid night
the darkness has snapped

mustard seed of hope
in the dark winter midnight
nestled in my bed

the dark tastes bitter
the silent damp hours empty
winter inside hope

forty-two years old
unemployed, single and mad
healthy, friends, learning

I live in the dark
body clock drifting vampire
lost alone birthday

moving by inches
taking a day at a time
careful with my mind

mauled by santa's claws
the Christmas shopping season
the present of debt

fifteen, on a box,
rope around my neck, swaying,
it snapped, failed again

afternoon curry,
sunday laughter, drinks and friends,
a lovely warm time

walking on the beach
watching rock climbers and waves,
yachts in the distance

shadows in my skull
throw darkness upon my life
the woodshed drummer
grins at the demons within
a rictus smile, aces and eights

pico lighthouses
flash warnings of ice, photons
slide away from Earth

scream into the dark
about the song of sunlight days
out of reach like hope

lost inside my head
alien industrial gardens
running drunk and mad

awkward in my skin
discombobulated by
normal things in life

the red and the blue
the obsession/delusion
the echoes in time

between the book ends
big bang to final heat death
standing in the light

between the book ends
big bang to when protons decay
standing in the light

between the book ends
big bang to the final rip
standing in the light

between the book ends
big bang to uncertain stop
standing in the light

the lives of the dead
Emperor of the known world
Nearly forgotten

the bridge, the silent
winter landscape between us,
we hold hands in dreams

the gate, the flower
the exchange of touch, looks, licks
the thrusts, trust, release

stroking the petals
playing with the nerve cluster
breath, fingers, tongue, juice

my housemate's birthday
going out for a curry
wearing silly hats

spirit animal
the mouse in a shadow maze
searching nervously

the memes of my world
I bow to the east and west
Kali, Jesus, science

I had love, yet to
pick at the scab of childhood
the can of maggots

during my childhood
books my solace, clouds of flies,
bags of food rotting

my self confidence
brittle, the slightest knock breaks
a glass spider's web

soap greyed bath water
womb warmth enveloped and steam
in the cold bathroom

beyond hydrogen
forged within a star
the dust in my tears

The autumn garden,
masala of damp and cold.
Waiting for acorns.

my subconscious mire.
My mother ... gross ... freudian
just a dream but yuck

procrastination
write about that now or not?
I force myself to.

integer to float
cast to a more precise type
it is still discrete

brutally honest
poetry of warts and all.
Did I go too far?

skid mark on my bed
what the fuck! I clean myself,
so why is it there?

my thoughts torque and tilt
surfing a wave of crazy
extra meds for me

Remembrance Sunday.
Free. Yet war has murdered sleep
for my godfather.

place strand over strand
learning the weave of the knot
memory, life, death

my furry neighbour
the world's meowyist cat
exploring my house

I thought it was me.
Bereft of motivation
because of the meds!

the drift of silence
letter to a dead father
sea glass tumbling


inspired by "Full fathom five"

the quiet breathes deep
the warm bed of sleep's river
holding me with love

to save the tiger
beautiful fearsome neighbour
fine in the abstract

thou art "art" my muse
illusion and delusion
I grasp you recede

unrequited love
tranquility eludes me
I seek to awake

the night drawing in
the season where some friends shriek
inside their marrow

festivals of light
Diwali and Bonfire Night
Leicester together

blue is the beauty
sailing in the solar wind
a spectrum apart

My uncertainty.
With the observation done
the wave collapsed

resist temptation
slide through the water of doubt
she loves another

walking out of step
i hear the beat of a drum.
my syncopation

something in my eye,
bathe it and fight my instinct.
I stop rubbing it.

a work in progress
education continues
of the soul and heart

waiting patiently
the download will never end
my soul and hope weep

I need to focus
I float, swept by the current
the river of days

the madness of cats
distilled into night laughter
in the distant grass

thanks to Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell

floating in a pool
the dance of the spinning top
delusions of love

central heating on
the outside world is bracing
clear blue autumn day

my pussycat friend
i feared when you disappeared
oblivious cat

an inception dream
restart rewrite images
floating spinning top

feel the empty stars
their dust gathers in my eyes
earth in the silence

the government cuts
public services destroyed
the Tories return

lost in the dark wood
no compass, the stars hidden
doubts scratch at my soul

indoors whilst it rains
our little island of warmth
casserole cooking

a cup of coffee
reading and warm whilst it rains
autumn has arrived

Computer coding
slowly, slowly learning more
staircase with no top

the overgrown path
the way is unclear and dark
the way home is east

the daily ritual
the basin of hot water
the blade strokes my face

my exams finished
i luxuriate in sloth
the warm bed of peace

round and round it goes
my delusions spin about
my merry-go mind

give me song and wine
before the darkening sky
takes hold of my soul

the soul wealth I crave
books, music, nature and friends
then my life is full

art is my garden
where I like to sit and think
books, music, soul wealth

the river, the road
the journey for Ithaca
the tau of my life

from out of the dark
my demons swirl around me
"the fear" assails me

the drawing of you
With your head slightly tilted
made with love by him

cast upon the shore
the ship wreck survivor walks
birds glide overhead

we had a long talk
settling issues of weight
last night in my dream

breakers ... a lee shore
battling the turbulent sea
the engine sparks ... life

A tanka

For I am but dust
Atoms from inside a star
Yet I am aware
How is it that I can think?
Chaos chemistry and time

my heart's measured pace
a hop, a step and a jump
when I think of you

Uni revision
going through the books again
slowly sinking in

the day starts slowly
reading the news on the web
and strong black coffee

early morning cars
swish, hurry, before the flood
they rush to ... progress?

Living on the dole
is my life circling the drain?
the tau of the leech?

she is a nut case
am I in love with the nut
or just with the case


derived from a line in the series Ideal s6e04

berries collecting
in the damp autumn garden
the year fades to sleep